6 Things We Learned From MELISSA AUF DER MAUR!

I’ve felt inspired by Melissa Auf der Maur for years. As the super-cool, flame-haired bassist of not only Hole but also the Smashing Pumpkins, her story is almost like the story of 90s rock itself. These two huge bands have put Melissa at the centre of rock culture several times in her life, often adjacent to the very eye of the storm: bandmates with Courtney Love, protege of Billy Corgan, one-time partner of Dave Grohl…you just know that she’s gonna have stories, and that’s before we even account for her upbringing in bohemian Montreal with a local hero for a dad!

Today sees the release of her autobiography, Even the Good Girls Will Cry, which takes in her life story as far as the turn of the millennium. It’s a captivating, involved, layered read, full of anecdotes, yes, but also more esoteric fare and spiritual dimensions. It’s a centre-stage account of some of the most iconic and turbulent times of the 90s, when rock was the biggest genre of music on earth, and those who played it still worshipped as countercultural demigods.

It’s a hell of a read, and of course I wanted to speak to the author! A few weeks ago, we jumped on a call together and made our way through some of the resonances and textures that were brought to life in Melissa’s text. The entire interview is available at the bottom, but I thought I’d first draw you towards 7 moments that resonated with me as Melissa and I had our conversation…

Everyone was worried about the ‘Y2k bug’ and the coming millennium, but for Melissa and many others, there was a definite sense of elegy at the end of the 90s. Music had changed, culture had changed, and not for the better. “It was a warning and a mourning - an awareness of what was being lost”.

Melissa’s very forthcoming about the more invisible and esoteric side of life, and indeed got her book’s title from a dark dream vision when she was 19. We talk about that, and whether it’s a ‘Higher Self’ or something else entirely…

Both of Melissa’s highest profile gigs have been about stepping into large bands suffering tragic loss. I learned that observing and reflecting - to ‘look at it later’ has been an important practice for her entire life.

Although Melissa went to an experimental music school, she never learned to read music. A world-class bassist, she was nevertheless chosen by both Hole and the Smashing Pumpkins primarily for her personality and attitude.

When asked for advice by young women, she tells them: “Don’t take lessons and do not try too hard! Be yourself!”

Melissa talks about entering a different dimension of experience when first joining Hole. I mention an example of how surreal her life seemed then, and she agreed: “I thought, I am now a character in a fairytale. I get it!”

Throughout our conversation - and indeed in her book - Melissa repeatedly reframes the public perception of Courtney Love, noting how undervalued her contributions to culture and art have been. She talks about how noble and honest Courtney is, and what a positive force of nature she can be. Melissa also talks about how Hole’s legacy is overlooked, largely thanks to a male-centric media who deny the band’s influence.

Like I said: really inspiring! Melissa’s book, Even the Good Girls Will Cry, is available everywhere from Atlantic Books. My deep thanks to Melissa for giving me such an excellent conversation, and to Kirsty for making it all happen.

And now: you’ve seen the clips, so here is the full 45 minute conversation. Enjoy!

Did you like this? If so, I’ve interviewed over 200 other musicians including Billy Corgan, Nine Inch Nails, The Doors and many more! Head across to the guitarguitar interviews page or click the links below.